the government wants us to touch grass and honestly i'm triggered

it's honestly so much right now. just the labor of existing is a full-time job with no pto, and today the universe, or more specifically, senior advisor stephen miller, decided to log on and choose violence.

tw: compulsory grounding, toxic positivity, government overreach.

i was in the middle of a really important somatic release exercise (lying face down on my weighted blanket, which you can find on my amazon storefront under 'things that aren't actively trying to harm me') when i got the ping. another white house press conference. my therapist says i need to set boundaries with the news cycle, but it feels like a violation not to bear witness to the collective trauma.

so stephen miller, whose entire aura is just, like, static from a dead channel, gets up to the podium and announces the 'department of vibe security,' or the dvs. he said, with a straight face, that 'perpetual doomscrolling is a threat to our national mood' and that they would be 'making america calm again.'

he then unveiled their flagship policy: federally mandated vibe checks. basically, they're forcing an update to truth social—which is already a nightmare hellscape—that monitors your scroll velocity and sentiment. if the algorithm decides you are 'chronically online' or 'engaging in negative energy transfer,' you get an alert for 'compulsory grounding.'

i am not making this up. the app literally geofences you out of all social media until your phone's gps confirms you have spent sixty (60) minutes in a federally designated 'green space.' they're literally forcing us to touch grass. this is state-sanctioned gaslighting. they're telling us our valid feelings of existential dread are a national security risk.

this is so deeply problematic on so many levels. it's ableist. it's bio-essentialist. it ignores the lived experience of everyone whose safe space is the digital space. my entire community is here. you are here. forcing me into the 'outdoors'—a space with bugs and unpredictable atmospheric conditions—is a genuine attack on my well-being.

the system is not broken; it was built this way. it's late-stage capitalism demanding we perform wellness so we can be more productive cogs in a toxic machine. this isn't about our health; it's about control. it's about silencing our dissent by forcing us to look at a tree.

this is so much to process, and if you're feeling a deep sense of derealization like me, it's so valid. holding space for that. i've actually curated some gentle grounding tools on my storefront to help us reclaim our vibes on our *own* terms, inside, where it's safe. think less 'compulsory park visit,' more 'noise-canceling headphones and a really good aromatherapy diffuser.' we have to protect our energy when the world is trying to legislate it.

stay safe and stay inside, besties. holding you all in the light.