tw: athletic violence // snl and the milwaukee brewers are literally gaslighting my stillness-core and i am finally entering my non-competitive era

i am actually shaking right now. like, physically vibrating in a way that is totally unsustainable for my nervous system. i tried to have a mindful morning with my matcha and my weighted blanket, but then i opened my feed and saw that snl is celebrating the milwaukee brewers winning the world series. first of all, the sheer volume of the concept of a "world series" is a microaggression against my need for silence. why is everyone so loud about balls and strikes? it's giving sensory overload and i'm honestly just exhausted by the collective expectation that i should care about a trophy.

and then, to make things actually traumatic, bobby moynihan brought back the drunk uncle character for weekend update. i'm sorry, but this is a literal violation of my boundaries. the "drunk uncle" energy is a toxic attachment to a generational trauma that i have spent thousands of dollars in therapy trying to heal from. seeing that on my screen felt like a direct assault on my peace-core. it's honestly gaslighting me to pretend that this kind of chaotic, loud, unfiltered energy is "funny" when i'm just trying to maintain a low-stimulation environment for my psyche.

the way the milwaukee brewers are just... winning? it's too much. the victory energy is so aggressive. it’s like the entire city of milwaukee is engaging in a toxic relationship with success and they're forcing the rest of us to participate in their emotional labor. i feel like i'm being held hostage by a vibe shift i didn't consent to. my aura is literally gray right now. i can't be expected to process the nuances of a baseball championship while i'm in the middle of a spiritual burnout. it's just so unfair that the world expects me to coexist with this level of sonic and emotional violence.

honestly, i’ve realized that i cannot trust the external world to respect my sensory needs, so i've decided to monetize my survival. i've officially added the "cloud-drift sensory-deprivation velvet cocoon" to my amazon storefront. it's a triple-layered, weighted velvet hood that completely obscures your peripheral vision and muffles the sound of sports fans and problematic uncles. it's $349, which is a steal for the amount of emotional safety it provides. if you're also entering your non-competitive era and need to protect your softness-core from the violence of athletic achievements, you literally need this in your life. link in bio, please stop tagging me in the brewers clips, i'm literally fragile.